Thursday, January 6, 2011

Monsters - GO AWAY!

This has been a terrible week – the worst week since we’ve been home with Ry.  Period.  Dust and I are exhausted, emotionally drained, frustrated and at our wits end…and it’s only Thursday…


On Sunday evening Ry, unfortunately, saw a monster on the TV screen.  He immediately came to find me and tell me that he was scared and had seen a monster.  The kid was honestly freaked out.  We tried to calm him down, immediately went to find where the monster was and dealt with that.  He was freaked out all night.  He didn’t want to go to sleep in his own bed.  We fought it and told him there was no such thing as monsters, suck it up and go to sleep.  He finally fell asleep, just to wake up in the middle of the night and stay awake for 3 ½ hours…which also meant we were up.




We then started researching to figure out how to handle this and guess what?!?!  We were handling the worst possible way…go figure!  So now on top of frustration and exhaustion we felt stupid and like bad parents…great…  Kids Ryland’s age can’t separate fantasy from reality yet and the worst thing you can do is to discount their fears and tell them to be a big boy and get over it.  Whoops.  So we tried all the advice we could find online.  We asked friends.  We asked family.  We tried lots of things.  We’ve had Ry sleep on the floor of our room.  We’ve stayed right by his side.  We’ve had all lights in the house on, at the same time.  We’ve hunted the monsters.  We’ve thrown everything that he deemed scary out.  We’ve tried.  The dang monsters will not go away.


He really is scared of monsters, I believe that…but I also believe he is milking this for everything that he can, and I’m not one that likes to be “had”.


He is relentless.  The first thing he said to me yesterday when I got home was “can I sleep in your room?”  Not even Hi, Mama – I missed you…  He cannot do anything on his own anymore…ANYTHING.  He doesn’t want to shut the bathroom door.  He will not play Wii.  He will not watch cartoons.  He will not play with his toys in his room at all and he will only play with them if he is in the same room as you.  He will not do anything unless one of us is right there.  The other morning he was told to go in the bathroom and brush his teeth.  In the course of 10 minutes of flossing, mouthwash & brushing he called out to us 8 times… “Mama – where are you?  Mama – can you come in here and check on me?  Mama, Mama, Mama.”  Yikes.  We can’t accomplish anything without feeling the effects of this monster.  He’s not listening or following directions…I’m about to lose all my hair (and I really don’t want to do that; I got it done recently and it looks really cute).


Anyway…tonight is war.  Prepare yourself monster and please, please go away.  I want my space back.  I want my room back.  I want my sanity back.  I want my little boy that can entertain himself from time to time back.  Dust and I are armed and dangerous.  We’ve got books.  We’re making Monster Be Gone Spray.  We’ve got the flashlights and the walkie-talkies ready.    And, hopefully this works…I’m tired, exhausted and frustrated.  If this doesn’t work, I’m out of ideas…maybe burn the house, with all the monsters in it, down and start from scratch?


Wish us luck…we’re going to need it.






  1. I loved this story. It is a learning time for all of you!

  2. Maybe a little change of scenery is the trick. You could go somewhere for a night (and make sure he sleeps in a bed by himself) while the house it "cleaned" to make sure there are no monsters. I don't know... but I wish you lots of luck!

  3. Wow! I can't help but wonder if there isn't more to Ryland's fear than just the monsters that he saw on T.V. Maybe, he is responding to all the changes in his young life. All the changes can be "monsters" too. You have been through a lot of changes too. Maybe, this incident forced you to deal with the change-monster too. I have every confidence that you will be able to love Ryland through this bout with monsters and that you will be gentle with yourself too. There are no such people as perfect parents. We all struggle and hope and pray that our mistakes don't seriously damage our children. Remember that all of you have been through a lot. It has been a good change but even good changes carry their own "monsters." Please know that I am sending you love and care.

  4. My daughter was afraid as well. I actually allowed her to sleep with the main light on for about the first nine months. She felt safe with it on. At about nine months I introduced a nighttable lamp which was not as bright as the main light. Then after another four or so months I transitioned to the hallway light being on. Finally after about two years I was able to get us down to a nightlight with the agreement if she wakes up and is scared she can turn on the hall light.